A Conspiracy of Trash

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Saturday, 28 June 2014

ENGLAND’S WORLD CUP FOOTBALL PERFORMANCE - SHAMEFUL ALL OVER

So it’s over at last. No more agony for England’s millions of fans after the national team was dumped out  the competition. It wasn’t just the defeats but the way they allowed it to happen. After two long years of preparation on a fantastic salary Roy Hodgson had to field a completely new team against Costa Rica for their final game and even then they could only manage a draw! So what did he have to show after all that time preparing a World Football Cup Squad. Answer, sweet nothing. England’s worst performance ever after two years of all that so called hard work. True, in their draw against the central American side they played a lot better, but after the disgrace against Italy and Uruguay there was only one way to go. Even then, five easy opportunities were missed by their lone hapless so-called striker.

A wretched goalless draw in their last game after two excruciating defeats and two ghastly draws in preceding friendlies. That was it! All that Roy Hodgson and his players could come up with after two long years of preparation was England’s worst ever failure! Quite frankly, what was all this so called preparation about? Every time you saw the team training on television it was a bit of darting about between sticks with a bit of knees up chucked in. They looked more like a bunch of tarts out on a Hen Night than a ruthlessly fit, ruthlessly trained squad who’d been road running hills ten miles a day. Worse, the whole squad seemed to lack confidence right from the start. You could see it there on their faces. No look of cold single-minded determination like they were there for the express purpose of doing a job rather than having a jolly. No hard ruthless efficiency. Just endlessly passing the ball to each other more backwards than forwards like they didn’t have any game plan. It could all be summed up in a couple of phrases, no imagination , no will to win!

And this is what they treated the fans to after two years of training. The thousands of followers who’d saved up their money to travel out to Brazil and watch. All that money, all those emotions invested in hope. And what were they given by those whose plane fares and food and hotel rooms were paid for and who earned good money besides? What were these loyal fans and supporters given in return? Quite frankly it wasn’t just rotten performance, more like something bordering on contempt. Then there were all those millions of fans back in England with their hopes raised high. No, it wasn’t just the failure. It wasn’t just the rotten performances game after game. When it comes down to it, it was the sheer disrespect. Not only for those who sang Rule Britannia but also their country. The England they supposedly represented.

One of the very worst aspects of the whole dismal experience to my mind were the attitudes of television’s footballing pundits. Those panels of experts, joke-joke, who along with the BBC or ITV presenters came on to give us their sagely wisdom, their judgements and their assessments. However in none of England’s games was there any cold, hard, critical analysis of the team’s performance and that of its players. Literally not a word of criticism, just an endless rolling out of excuses, one after another. Their sheer variety was staggering. Like they’d been practicing making them up for years, but then what else would you expect from these footballing chums who’d suddenly become experts brought on to entertain you with their wondrous knowledge! All pretty well paid for spouting their bullshit and the whole damned lot never having won anything on the international stage between them! Yeah, good money for soft soaping the footballing fans and rolling endless crap off their tongues. For Sturridge, who missed four or five sitters against Costa Rica it was an off day or he’ll do much better next time. Yards and yards of bullshit! The fans don’t want to know about next time. THEY WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT NOW and why this player was excused for his pathetic performances in an England shirt time after time! COULD IT ACTUALLY BE BECAUSE HE’S SIMPLY NOT UP TO IT. And if that’s the case why is he playing for England?

Listening to these BBC and ITV panels of experts bordered on sickening, same as the silly patriotic coaxing of their presenters. Yuck! Viewers didn’t want scented hair gels. They wanted victory, not wretched excuses. They get enough of those from politicians who make their lives hard enough paying for the excrescences of bankers so they don’t need it from you, soft soaping their disappointment and anguish after the appalling failure of the national football team. So you bright eyed and bushy tailed pundits and presenters doing a job for the footballing business. IF YOU CAN’T TELL THE TRUTH SHUT YOUR GOBS.

Finally all the talk now is about next time! Is that a joke? In recent times we had Glen Hoddle. Remember him? To get England into shape he communed with angels and tried various forms of therapy! Not long after came Sven! Remember him? Well-er… Remember the little Swede who earned himself a fortune from the FA for helping England go nowhere and certainly enjoyed his management time shagging secretaries. Then of course came Capello! On a simply fabulous annual salary who negotiated a contract that allowed him two years more money if he was out of the job. And the rewards for England during this time? NOTHING! Yes, the Football Association certainly know how to pick them! Fabulous Fabio’s been earning a serious screw from the Russians these days. Result? Goodbye Russia from the 2014 World Cup! The only question to be asked. How on earth do these people do it? I mean, do they just look at you, talk bullshit with an Italian or Swedish accent and you pay them fantastic money like you’re hypnotized or something?

And then came Roy. Good old Roy. Granny dearest! Yes, two years and he’d get an England team into shape! Well that time is up and you’ve seen the result. England’s worst ever performance. So talking next time I have a plan! Why not get some jerk-off from the Jeremy Kyle show to manage the team if Roy goes, which he won’t, and of course, no-one will push him. Some skinny little rat-arse covered in tattoos won’t need paying so much, just 100 bottles of lager a day and enough weed to fill a whole garden. Think I’m joking then think again! He can hardly do any worse than this time around! So what’s the difference between a Jeremy jerk-off and Roy?

The answer lies in the general culture that pervades our islands today. Paying the price for failure by rewarding it all over again.

One final point. Has anyone heard of an England footballer called Oxlade-Chamberlaine? Last I heard he was in the squad Roy brought to Brazil. He never played in any of the games and his name was barely mentioned by the pundits and presenters alike who as we all know will yak on about anything. So what happened to him and why did he suddenly become THE INVISIBLE MAN? If he was injured and couldn’t play why was he part of the squad? If he wasn’t injured then why didn’t he play? It’s as big a mystery as the missing Malaysian Aircraft! Nobody but nobody was prepared to say anything! It was like they’d all had their mouths sealed! Like his name was taboo right from the start and they’d all collectively been sworn to silence!

Rumour has it that Arsene Wenger, manager of Arsenal, the club he plays for in the Premier League contacted Roy Hodgson and told him he didn’t want him played for some reason. Was it injury? Was the man worth too much to risk him being played, even for England? Right now Oxlade-Chamberlaine is England’s biggest mystery of the Football World Cup 2014.

And England’s performance? Well that’s no secret at all!

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